It's Good to Talk - a Post for Teens

girls making a heart

My son dropped out of college last May. He'd failed his Christmas exams and was pretending to go to lectures for months. Every day he'd get up, shower and leave the house. Every late afternoon he'd come back and I'd ask him how his day went.

'Fine,' he'd say. But I knew something was up. He wasn't himself. He was quiet, withdrawn and didn't want to engage with the family. He just wanted to be left alone.

His summer exams crept nearer and nearer. I went into his room one evening and sat on the side of his bed.

'How's the study going?' I asked him.

'Fine,' he said. But he couldn't meet my eye.

I told him I was sitting there until he talked to me, even if it took all night. He knows how stubborn and determined I can be (I'm a writer after all, you don't get a novel finished without being both, plus a little bit insane, but that's a blog for another day) so he started to open up. He admitted that he hadn't been going to college for months. He told me how much he hated his lectures, how he felt so small, so insignificant. That the classes were so big (nearly 500 in his English lectures) that he hadn't made many friends, that he'd made a mistake, it wasn't the right course for him and he didn't know what to do about it. That he felt he'd let me down.

I was so upset for him that I started to cry. He was pretty close to it himself. I told him I loved him no matter what. That I didn't give two hoots about him failing his exams, I just wanted him to enjoy college, to make friends, and yes, maybe to learn something useful, but most of all to be happy. I told him that I was proud of him for telling me the truth, even if it had taken him a while.

There's nothing my son could do that would make me any less proud of him. He's a wonderfully funny, thoughtful, smart young man. Yes, sometimes he drives me crazy and you should see the state of him room, but right now he's down at the sailing club teaching young children how to sail.

girls talking on step

In the end we sorted things out - he re-applied to a different college - a much smaller college to do a different kind of degree. He is now in first year again and has already made loads of new friends. 

So why am I telling you all this?

Life isn't always easy. Sometimes we hold things inside, we don't tell the people closest to us - our family, our friends - how we really feel. We keep plodding on, hoping things will get better. But sometimes they don't and we need help.

If things are getting on top of you please be brave - reach out and tell someone. As the old BT ad used to say, 'It's good to talk'.

Sarah XXX

This post first appeared on www.girlsheartbooks.com

Writing.ie Book Lunch - With Special Guest, Jennifer Johnston

Writing.ie Book Lunch – An Author at Every Table

In Association with Dubray Books

With Special Guest, Jennifer Johnston

Jennifer Johnston

Venue: Royal St George Yacht Club

Date: Saturday 18th October

Time: 12.00pm until 3.30pm (lunch will be served at 12.30pm)

Cost: e28.50 – includes a three course meal plus tea/coffee

Bookshop on site provided by Dubray Books – all the writers’ books will be in stock

To book: ring Kate at 01 2801811 (places limited, please book quickly)

You can book a whole table for your book club, or come with a friend or individually

To request to be seated with a particular author, please email sarahsamwebb@gmail.com before 10th October and we will do our best to accommodate you

About the Lunch:

Join some of Ireland’s top writers at this exclusive book lunch in the beautiful surroundings of the Royal St George Yacht Club on Dun Laoghaire’s sea front. Talk books and writing with your table host, and hear an after lunch conversation with the award winning novelist, Jennifer Johnston.

This lunch will be presented by Vanessa O’Loughlin from writing.ie and writer, Sarah Webb.

Our Author Hosts:

jennifer j books

Literary powerhouse, Jennifer Johnston (latest novel - A Sixpenny Song); writer and historian, Turtle Bunbury (published in October - The Glorious Madness: Tales of the Irish and the Great War);  bestselling authors, Sheila O’Flanagan (latest novel - If You Were Me) and Emma Hannigan (published in October - The Heart of Winter); author of the critically acclaimed The House When It Happened, Martina Devlin; award-winning author of The Playground, Julia Kelly; historical novelists, Kate Beaufoy (pen name of Kate Thompson, latest novel - Liberty Silk) and Lia Mills (latest novel - Fallen); crime novelists Liz Nugent (debut novel - the muct praised Unravelling Oliver) and Karen Perry (Paul Perry and Karen Gillece – debut novel, The Boy Who Never Was); and finally, TV3 chef, Andrew Rudd (latest book - Entertaining with Andrew Rudd).

www.writing.ie

www.dubray.ie

How To Get Published by Breakthrough YA Author, Louise O’Neill

Louise O'Neill

Louise will be appearing at the Mountains to Sea dlr Book Festival on 13th September (details below)

Upon hearing that I’ve written a novel, some people want to know where I get my ideas from, as if there’s an idea-shop you can just pop in to on your way home from work. Lidl will probably start offering ‘Idee’s’ soon. They’re basically the same thing as ideas but far cheaper.  Others ask about the storyline. ‘It’s a dystopian tale exploring the contemporary obsession with the female body. Think The Handmaid’s Tale for teenagers.’  I answer, watching as every man in a two mile radius backs away. No wonder I’m still single. And then, of course, there are the frustrated writers, lips tightening with barely concealed envy when they hear my good news. I know these people. I was one of them, poring over a newspaper article about some child of fifteen who has sold their first novel for half a million euro, trying to ignore the hatred threatening to suck me under, as greedy as a slurry pit. There is nothing more disheartening than seeing someone else realising your dreams.

So, here are my top tips on how to finally write that novel.

• Read voraciously. Stephen King said ‘If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time to write.’ A badly written book will demonstrate what not to do and a well written book will inspire you. Be warned, a masterpiece will merely leave you with a general sense of hopelessness as your novel will never be anywhere as good. I had to take to my bed for a few days after finishing ‘Cloud Atlas’ like a Victorian maiden with a case of the vapours.
• Think of your writing skills as a muscle. The more you use them, the stronger they will become. The thought of completing an entire manuscript can seem so insurmountable we find ourselves unable to take the first step. Set yourself smaller tasks to begin with. Write an article for your local newspaper. Write a short story. Write five hundred words on your first holy communion. Julia Cameron, in her excellent book The Artist’s Way, recommends ‘morning pages’ and I’ve found freehand writing to be an effective tool of unblocking creativity.
• When you do decide to start your novel, make sure you’re passionate about your idea. This might sound obvious but you’ll be working on this project for the next nine to twelve months, or more. There will be days when you hate your book, you hate your brain for generating the original idea and you hate your laptop for having the audacity to record all these stupid words. If you don’t adore the idea at the beginning, you will likely ever reach the end.
• Set yourself a deadline. When I first moved back to Ireland from New York on September 1st, 2011, I decided to take a year out to work on the novel that I had spent the last ten years threatening to write. I finished the first draft on August 31st, 2012.
• I remember phoning my father from New York, complaining that my job in fashion ‘didn’t make my heart sing.’ I know. Oprah has a lot to answer for. He told me if I wanted to write so badly I should take any opportunity that I had to do so. Bring a notebook with you and write on the subway, he advised, unaware that I spent my subway journey gawking surreptitiously at barefoot crack heads or avoiding eye contact with anyone I might feel compelled to offer my seat to. (Apologies to that pregnant lady on crutches. My bad.) Once back in Clonakilty, I made myself sit at my desk from 7am to noon every day, whether I felt like it or not. Some days, the words came. Other days, I sat there, staring at the blank page. It didn’t matter. I still sat at my desk at the same time every day. Of course, I was lucky enough to have parents who provided a room ‘of one’s own’ and, more importantly, a new laptop to put in that room.  I don’t have children or a tyrannical boss or a crippling mortgage to pay and I’m aware that these must feel like truly impossible obstacles. But you owe to yourself to at least try to carve out some time every week that you can use to write.
• Social media, while beneficial for ‘research’, is really only a method of distraction. When asked how one of the authors on his roster managed to maintain such a prolific work rate, Jonny Geller, an agent with Curtis Brown, replied ‘He doesn’t have twitter.’ Until novels come in a 140 character size, it’s not helping you.
• Be prepared to make sacrifices. In my case, the first casualty was an active social life. Jodi Picoult describes writing as ‘successful schizophrenia’ and I found it very difficult at times to interact normally with other people when all I could think about was this world I had created in my head. Personal aesthetic standards also suffered. When I worked in fashion, I didn’t own any items of clothing that could ever be described as ‘practical’. Or, indeed, anyway comfortable. Things are so bad that when I wash my hair, my father asks if I’m going anywhere special and my mother claps her hands in glee, like I’m a toddler learning to use the potty.
• Some authors edit their work as they go along but I saved all my editing for the end, like the crappy pink and brown Roses at the bottom of the tin that no one wants at Christmas. There is a peculiar type of shame in reading ‘Slowly, she walked slowly down the corridor slowly.’ In case you don’t comprehend the subtlety of my brilliance, I was trying to convey that the character was very, very, very slow.
•  Once you finish the first draft, edit, edit and then edit some more. As Faulkner said, ‘...kill all your darlings.’ You’re just showing off anyway. Ask a friend who is an avid reader to take a look at your manuscript. Choose someone you trust to be both honest and gentle with you.
• When you have a finished manuscript in fairly good nick, you need to find an agent. An agent will take a proportion of your earnings (generally around 15%) but they are essential, as most publishing companies don’t accept unsolicited manuscripts. When submitting to an agency, they usually want to see the first three chapters, a covering letter and your CV but check their websites for individual guidelines. Choose an agent that has authors you admire on their roster or who represents authors who are writing in similar genre to you. Make your covering letter engaging. If you’re someone’s love child, now is the time to mention it. Unless it’s someone embarrassing, like Mick Hucknell. Keep that to yourself. Forever.
• Be prepared for rejection and don’t take it personally. JK Rowling famously received twelve rejection letters and I think she’s managing to pay her electricity bill these days. You want your agent to fight for your book when they’re trying to sell it to a publisher. If they don’t ‘get’ it, then they’re not the right agent for you anyway.

Going Too Far? Panel Discussion on YA Fiction with CBI

Venue: dlr Lexicon, Dun Laoghaire, Co Dublin

Date: Sat 13th Sept @ 4.30-6.30pm

Price: e8/e5 students

Age: Students and adults

only ever yours

Booking: www.mountainstosea.ie or 01 2312929

Writing Tips from Award Winning Author, Sheena Wilkinson

Writing Tips from Sheena Wilkinson

Sheena Wilkinson with Elaina Ryan of CBI and Writer, Deirdre Sullivan

See Sheena at the Mountains to Sea Book Festival (details below)

1. Everyone will say the same thing here; that’s because it’s so important. READ. Read everything. Read in your favourite genre and outside it. Read to see how stories work. Read to remind yourself that books are magic, and that you want to create that magic for someone else.
2. Find out what works for you. I faffed around with unfinished novels for years because I kept stopping to edit as I went along, always aiming for that perfect first chapter. For me, it’s better to write to the end of a rough first draft and then go back and redraft, and redraft, and redraft. It’s less work in the long run, and for me having a complete draft, even though it’s rubbishy, gives me a feeling of achievement and something to work on. This seems to work for lots of writers. It may not work for you but it’s worth trying if, like me until about six years ago, you find it hard to get to the end. And the first drafts are getting better.
3. Give yourself goals. It may be that you’ll write for an hour a day, or that you’ll finish a sort story by the end of the month, or that you’ll do a thousand words a day, or 500 or even 100. You can move the goalposts as you get more serious. If I think about the whole project of a novel, I feel a bit gulpy and want to go and lie down, but if I think that I aim to do 6,000 words a week and that means 1,000 words day with a day off, that seems more manageable. I have printed off a geeky calendar so I can waste time filling it in and adding happy/sad faces accordingly. You can get software to do this for you, but why bother, when you can use up hours of writing time colouring in and highlighting?
4. Fall in love. With your book. I can’t get into something and spend a year – or, in the case of my forthcoming novel, 2 ½ years (I took time off to write another book in the middle) – on it unless I love it. So don’t follow the market or write about something because you think you ‘should’: write what you love. It helps to have a bit of  a crush on at least one character. BUT, however in love you are…
5. Don’t be precious! You know how being in love is great, but it can make you a bit blind to someone’s actual qualities? That. So when your editor/agent/writing buddy/mum suggests that something in your book could maybe work better, consider that they might be right. After all, you want them to fall in love with your book too.

Sheena will be appearing on the Going Too Far? Panel Discussion at the Mountains to Sea Book Festival 2014 with debut novelist, Louise O'Neill, David O'Callaghan from Eason, reviewer and writer, Mary Arrigan and reader, Aaron Williams.

A must for anyone interested in writing or reading YA fiction.

Saturday 13th September, Lexicon, Dun Laoghaire (new library) 4.40-6pm

e8 adults/e5 students

5 Things You May Not Know About Writer, Kjartan Poskitt

Kjartan Poskitt in Action

Kjartan Poskitt, creator of the Murderous Maths books and the wonderful Agatha Parrot series will be in Dun Laoghaire next week for the Mountains to Sea Book Festival. Here are some facts you may not know about Kjartan:

1/ He's from Yorkshire but he has an odd accent (or so he says).

2/ He wrote the theme tune for children's art show, SmArt and children's show, Brum.

3/ Most of his books start life written on the edge of a soggy newspaper.

4/ His favourite author is Philip Reeve.

5/ He can play cat and dog noises on a synthesiser.

All absolutely true!

Catch his wonderful Murderous Maths show on Friday 12th September in the Pavilion Theatre, Dun Laoghaire during the Mountains to Sea dlr Book Festival. Age 4th to 6th class  e3 per child  (Limited tickets still available) Log onto www.mountainstosea.ie or ring: 01 2312929 to book

One of Kjartan's Books

5 Things You Might Not Know About Writer, Alan Nolan

5 Things You Might Not Know About Alan Nolan

Alan Nolan

See Alan in Action at the Mountains to Sea dlr Book Festival (details below)

 1. Alan was born with a full head of red hair. It fell out before he was six months old and grew back dark brown. It’s now falling out again!

2. His first comic was called Splat and featured a lazy superhero character called the Bedspread who travelled around in the Bedmobile (a double bed with wheels) and lethargically fought crime in Slug City. The Bedspreads arch-enemy was called Wakey Wakey.

3. Alan loves spiders, caterpillars and beetles (in fact, he loves all ‘creepy crawlies’), but he’s deathly scared of mice and rats.

4. He has read every Charles Dickens novel at least twice. His favourite is A Christmas Carol, which he owns fives copies of – one with illustrations by Arthur Rackham, and one illustrated with puppets made by Fluck & Law of Spitting Image fame.

5. He used to be a huge fan of Star Trek, and has a full Star Trek The Next Generation costume in his wardrobe. Unfortunately, over the years the shirt and waistband of the uniform trousers have ‘shrunk in the wash’.

fintans 15 cover

See Alan in Action at the Mountains to Sea dlr Book Festival

My Favourite Superheroes with Alan Nolan - Comic Book Fun for All the Family

Assembly Room, County Hall, Dun Laoghaire  Saturday September 13th @ 10.30 to 11.30am

e4 per child (age 7+)/e6 per adult  To book: 01 2312929 or www.mountainstosea.ie